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Whether it ends with a bang or a whimper, breaking up is a difficult time in life. In fact, a study done by some Columbia neuroscientists points to the fact that going through a break up triggers the same regions of the brain that react to physical pain.


Peacing out on any relationship whether you are the breaker or the broken sucks big time. This includes unfollowing them on social networks, avoiding seeing them in person, and removing remnant reminders of them scattered about your apartment. Out of site, out of mind. Even if you hold out hope for rekindling your relationship. Sure, you should effectively process and mourn the relationship so as not to bottle up your emotions, but you have to start realizing the positives as well and that begins with self-love.

What to do right after a breakup

Avoid the temptation to compare yourself to others! You see this and wonder when this same moment will happen for you again. But, screw that! Everyone has their own life trajectory.

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Life is about loving your own unique awesomeness and eventually finding a companion to amplify said awesomeness. And it will happen for you! I promise. But, comparing yourself to others will not help you there.

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Focus on yourself and being the best version of yourself possible. Great relationships will follow.

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One way to limit negative thoughts from spiraling through your head is to focus on the positive. The clouds in the sky, your parents support, the roof over your head. Treat life as a blessing. The more you positively perceive even the little things in your day to day, your lens on life will adjust to a much happier place.

The difference in my appearance between now and when I got divorced two years ago is astounding. I dressed like crap, weighed too much, and had an extremely average beard. For me, it starts with hitting the gym. Get in a good routine of exercise and follow that up with a diet that nourishes your body.

Post-breakup do's and don'ts

Surround yourself with positive people. Find like-minded people through new activities that excite you. Focus on loving yourself, surrounding yourself with amazing, positive people, and good things will happen. For a full breakdown of the top15 things to do after a breakup, make sure you scope out the checklist to get over your ex. Search AskMen Search. Messages You have no messages. Notifications You have no notifications. Matt Shumate.

Feel the feelings

Show comments. Comments Share your opinion Your name. Breaking Up Better Man Breakups. Relationship Advice. Dating Advice.

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Posted June 12, Reviewed by Devon Frye.


Breakups and the emotions they bring up are complicated.


Since my personal list included items I wouldn't recommend to others though I do contend that whatever your version of "have too many gimlets," "Facebook messages different exes" and "wake up in last night's dress" is part of the process , I asked experts what they thought.


Stock your cupboards with fruit and veg and supplies for cooking.